How can you show value to your spouse? Here are three ways to show your spouse how much they mean to you.

1. Appreciation.

William James said, “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.” A biblical proverb says it best, “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones” (Prov. 16:24 NIV). Appreciation is like a honeycomb to the human spirit; it enriches our heart and heals our body. Mark Twain once confessed he could “live for two months on a good compliment.”

2. Affirmation.

A man once ended up in counseling because his wife was in deep emotional pain. She was convinced that he no longer loved her. The counselor finally asked him, “Sir, when was the last time you told your wife you loved her?”

“When I married her 25 years ago I told her I loved her,” the man said. “If it ever changed I’d let her know.” Apparently, it hadn’t changed. But she didn’t know.

We all need affirmation. The Proverbs remind us, “A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver” (Prov. 25:11 NIV).

3. Acceptance.

We value each other by accepting our differences. The book title says it best, Men are from Mars, Women from Venus. We are different. For example, men tend to deteriorate physically about 10 percent every 10 years, women tend to deteriorate physically about 2 percent every 10 years, and in our country women live longer than men. Men have about 40 percent of their body weight as muscle, women have about 20 percent of their body weight as muscle, making it easier for them to gain weight and harder to lose it. Men tend to have heavier bones and thicker skin and skulls, women tend to have smoother skin with more insulation cells under the skin. Men tend to talk less than women. Men tend to favor the left side of their brains, where language and logic operate, and to be conqueror orientated, women tend to favor the right side of their brains, where the feeling, nurturing, relational part of life operates, and to be relationship orientated. We are different. We express love by acknowledging and respecting those differences.

Did you know that if we practiced love our relationships would be stronger, our jobs would be more meaningful, and our ailments would be fewer? Earlier this year I wrote an encouraging book on love called Chapter 13: The Excellence of Love. The book gets its title from perhaps the greatest statement ever made on love in 1 Corinthians 13. This book provides a guide to love, and, if practiced, it will make us well and whole. Click here to claim your copy.